Sundee Sunshine

1. Alive: I jumped back into the audition world, and though 1/3 of it was not pretty (and honestly kind of horrifying), I am proud of myself regardless of the outcome. And, like I said before, I. Am. Funny. That's what I will force myself to remember whenever I look back on this experience.

Can I say one more thing? I have a great life. It's no secret that the move back here to Utah was not easy for me. I was THRILLED to be close to family and friends and the mountains. I was LIVING what I'd wanted for SO long. I had a husband, a house, a calling in a great ward- it's what I had hoped for for years. BUT- it was hard. For the first time in my young adult life I COULD NOT perform. I LITERALLY could not be on the stage. The opportunity simply was not there.

I am somewhat of a freak. When I put my mind to something, I DO it. I obsess and I DO it. My twenties have been filled with "I will do _____" - and a few months later it's done. So last year I finally crossed "get married" off the list. With that, we left Orlando. I was happy with that. Totally fine with it. I was excited to live the life of a "normal" person.

Enter Amy the Normal Person: WHAT DO I DO WITH MYSELF??? I'd spent the last fifteen or so years playing other people more often than I was AMY. How's that for pathetic? So yes, lots of tears and confusion and feeling like a loser went on and on. Of course I was happy with my PERSONAL life, but I felt like a gigantic part of who I am had been ripped from me and I did not know how to handle it and just be me. WHAT DO I DO WITHOUT STAGE MAKEUP, TIGHTS, and FAKE LASHES?!??!

So- fast forward to now. I'm quite content with life. I like our little house in the "middle of nowhere," I like sitting on the couch at night with Chuck saying to each other "What should we do tonight?" "I dunno. Whaddya wanna do?" Life is blissful. And then I go to an audition...

And I realize something: If I don't get in (which I will not...) - It's OK. And whatever those people thought of me at that audition DOES NOT matter. It doesn't change the fact that tomorrow I will still wake up with a cute boy by me, that I will go to my not exactly fulfilling jobs and continue towards the worthwhile goal of getting our cars paid off, and that I am happy and content. Of course the crazy, career driven and motivated Amy burns with "I could do that" envy when I see the success stories of my MDT friends posted all over Facebook and blogs, but that's OK. I no longer have hysterical breakdowns when I see that someone got cast in "my show" or "my role." Being AMY is ok. And truthfully, it's better than being all those characters in the musicals who sing the great songs.

So that is my conclusion. Thanks for listening to that little rant. :-) Continuing on...

2. Plain No More: Thoughts of decorating my house have made me happy this week. Chuck and I stopped into the Z-Gallerie last week and oh, did my heart sing. I am starting folders on my computer with ideas for each room. Did you notice that my debt ticker is now at 23%??? Getting closer... ha ha. Still a ways to go, but getting ideas for what I will do with our house with all that extra cash is motivating I tell you!

This is my current obsession.

3. Mockery: Like it or not, Chuck and I tend to somewhat mock Utah delights such as "Soft Sunday (or should we say Sundee) Sounds" and "Sounds of the Sabbath." For months we have enjoyed, with friends, coming up with cheesy sayings that belong on the walls of Mormon homes in vinyl lettering. (No offense intended to anyone- I, myself, have found a few of these that I actually would use...) ANYWAY- the newest game is making up Sounds of the Sabbath songs. It's entertaining. And Chuck is funny. And I love it.

Really? Is it necessary to have a song that say things like, "Wrap your sins in a cocoon and emerge a butterfly..." ? (I apologize if you are the writer of that song...) Can't we just stick to the classics - "I Know That My Redeemer Lives, " "Because I Have Been Given Much," "Lead Kindly Light," Etc. etc. etc. I love those.

4. Campy: Friday night was fantastic with a campfire, awesome friends, tin foil dinners, and smores. What a wonderfully fun night. Oh, how I will miss this early Fall weather.





5. Orlando (Not Bloom) : One month from today. Can't wait.

6. When the Moon Hits Your Eye: We ate at THE PIE this weekend. We decided to forgo the State Fair and ended up just eating The Pie's fabulous pizza instead. Aaaaand tomorrow I begin working out again... cough...

7. SLC: Conference is in two weeks. Good stuff.

8. Baby: This guy is growing up...






Have a happy week!

But I. Am. Funny!!!

Awwwww I can dance decently when I have time to learn and tweak and stare in the mirror and practice and stuff.

But today the old clunker came out of the junk yard for a spin. She had about an hour to learn two combos and perfect them. It was not pretty.

BUT.

I read some lines. And the whole staff was cracking up.

I. Am. Funny.

And that's enough for me.

Sun

1. Tres: See previous post. * THREE YEARS OF CHUCK AND AMY *

2. Sing, Sing a Song: This week I am jumping back into the audition world - For the first time since January of 2008. YI-HI-KES. So I'll go in and sing my song, attempt to dance, and chalk it up to experience. Reume - Check. Headshot - Check. Confidence - Not so much. But here we go! ( I hesitated even writing about this... I don't like to share my assumed failures with the world. But I got thinking about it, and ya know, failure is a part of life. We learn from it. And it's good. So I CAN share without allowing my ego to be bruised in the process, right? Of course right! Thank you, Yente. )

3. Little Teeny Boppers: Had a great turn out for my musical theatre class auditions at the Scera this week. I am really excited about the class and think that this year's attempted musical will be "Guys and Dolls." Sure, Adelaide will be 14 years old... the amount of time she's been engaged to Nathan Detroit... but whatever! :-) The music and script are just too fun to pass up.

4. Brrrr: It's only 65 degrees in our house today. So I pulled out my little friend the Space Heater. We are bonding as it blows on my toes.

5. Green: Paid another $700 on the truck this week. As I write these checks I can't help but think about what I could DO with all that money. Long term goals... looking ahead... I can do this...

6. Chatty: Last night, at the adult session that I posted about earlier, the speaker mentioned over and over again how women BOND by talking. Men bond by ACTION. Oh, how grateful I am for chatty girlfriends that I can bond with. Several of my dearest friends are no longer close to me geographically- and it makes me sad. But I'm thankful that we get on the phone and chat for hours and it's almost as if they were right here. AND I am grateful for those ladies who ARE close by... so that every week we can catch up and BOND!

The End. For now.

The Seven Basic Needs of Relationships

Tonight Chuck and I attended the adult session of Stake Conference. We'd just eaten a lovely, and huge, dinner, and I'd fallen asleep in the car on the way home. Full and tired- not a fantastic way for me to begin a two hour meeting, right?

Most of the time the adult session of Stake Conference involves speakers like the Stake Pres. and his wife, a General Authority, and a few members of the Stake... or something like that. I was surprised, and excited, to find out that our adult session would be an interactive meeting with Matt Townsend, a relationship and communication expert who's quite well known here in Utah. (You can hear his relationship show on KSL Radio on Saturday mornings and he's on Studio 5 quite often.) I've always enjoyed listening to him. Yes, now you know- I am a talk radio nerd.

Months ago I'd seen Matt Townsend on Studio 5, (I posted a clip from it on here...) For about a week Chuck and I took one of his ideas - a "T Chart" called "I Felt Loved When..." I saved it. And it's in this year's "book." That was a great week.

Oh, how I wish so many of you could have been there. His words were entertaining, thought provoking, insightful, and provided great reminders for each one of us.

Chuck and I are still brand new at this whole marriage thing. It's a great and wonderful process that I love and enjoy. Lets face it though, it can also be frustrating and downright hard sometimes. We've had great ups and downs in the last year and a half. And tonight's session totally validated our awesomeness. :-)

He talked about the things that get in the way of marriage relationships: Pride, egos, selfishness, kids, pornography, money, etc. etc. etc... All of those fights- over those kinds of things, are "smoke," and the real, CORE issues, have to do with these:

The Seven Basic Needs of Relationships

1. Safety

2. Trust

3. Appreciation

4. Respect

5. Validation

6. Encouragement

7. Dedication

If one partner is feeling threatened in one of these areas, it's natural for them to want to attack the other's needs in one of these areas as well. And so the cycle goes...

It was all fascinating. And fun. And I loved it. It was motivating and exciting.

And now, when we get in little tiffs, I'm going to pull out my handy dandy little "notepad" (an expired coupon on which I wrote the Seven Basic Needs...) and ask, "OK honey, which one of these seven needs are you not getting from me right now?"

:-)

But tonight the 2nd counselor in our Stake called us "perfect." So I guess we are... :-)

Three

Tomorrow marks THREE YEARS of Chuck and Amy.

On September 12, 2007, Chuck Keeler kissed me on a playground in Lake Buena Vista, Florida, and the rest is history.

The annual book opening event...

Book #3

I'm quite happy with it -

With everything but the crazy Mod-Podge job.

Things got a little crazy with that this year, but oh well.

PS: Do you call it Modge Podge or Mod- Podge??

Three Years Later...

Celebrating at Gloria's Little Italy in Provo

Three Years of "The Story..."

HIGHLIGHTS

The Fun...

The Sad...

The Pet

We finished off the evening at the adult session of our Stake Conference. Matt Townsend , a relationship guy, was our speaker. A GREAT two hours... More on that later.

Labor Day Sunshine

1. G'ment: This is ironic considering how much I disagree with the Feds right now... but I won't complain about the State of Utah! So- we owed and paid taxes in January. (Early even!) Yesterday we got a check in the mail from the Utah State Treasurer- giving us 80% of what we paid BACK. No explanation. Just says it's a "tax refund." Do I call and question? Or do I chalk this one up to one of those "tithing blessings?" I like the latter...

2. Pretty Boy: See above story for the #2 Sunshine slot of the week.

3. 3 Years: Next Sunday marks THREE YEARS that The Boy and I have been together. For those of you who remember my yearly PROJECT, it's nearly complete. A week early!!


4. R & R: I haven't put on makeup for two days. Poor Chuck. Yep- I've been sick, but it's given me the chance to catch up on some well needed rest.

5. Wedding Cheesecake: My cousin Justin got married this past weekend. What a great sealing and reception they had. And boy, was I thrilled and impressed with the CHEESECAKE bar at their wedding. Oh. My. Heaven. Cheesecake, toppings, classy. Yeah. It was great. And that concludes the string of family weddings for the summer...

6. Crisp: Fall is in the air today. I love living in Utah where there are four distinct seasons. Time to drive the Alpine Loop soon...

7. Countdown: Orlando is coming soon... I'm excited. This girl needs a vacay.

8. Truck: The Toyota will officially be ours in less than two months. One almost down, one to go!!!!

9. Pad: Still diggin' The Bachelor Pad. Sue me.

10. I'd be amiss if I didn't mention this fantastic experience I had last week. The Hale Center Theater in Orem asked me, and these lovely folks, to put on a lil' show at the Tahitian Noni's summer party. What fun I had. And oh, how I miss singing for a living...

11. Kiddos: Life at the Scera starts again this week. Back to playing musical theatre with the junior high peeps!

So there they are. The little happies of my life. Nothing as glamorous as it all once was, but pretty decent nonetheless.

Too Good to Wait...

Hi. From work.

Do I normally blog from work? No. But it's dead here and some things are too good to not post immediately.

This is better than the time I worked for Costco and the lady asked when I was due...

The Setting: Unnamed Bridal/Prom store

The Time: Noon. 9/1/2010

In walks a middle aged, buzzed headed male. (The particular gender we don't really see much of here in this store - and if we DO - they tell me how we need a TV and couch for the men to watch sports on while the ladies giggle and oooo and awww- Let's face it folks, I'm in UTAH)

"Can I help you?"

"Just browsing."

"Are you looking for a particular occasion?"

(At this point my lil Mormon girl glasses are still on... He must be shopping for his daughter...)

"Nothing particular, just for fun."

He browses... sticks to the side of the store with the modest Prom dresses... Sizes 14-18...

"Are you doing ok?" I ask.

"Yeah. I want one with sleeves. Can I try some on?"

Hopefully my big doe eyes didn't give away my shock... this is NOT for his daughter...

"Sure." I pulled four dresses into the room for him. Two shades of blue, hot pink, and a yellow. All ballgowns. Mormon girl Prom ballgowns. Gulp.

He tries them on. I don't see much of him- maybe he's afraid of coming out to use the mirrors? Ooooop, no. There he is... sauntering the store in the navy blue frock. * Sparkles *

Then came his questions and need for fashion advice:

"What about a neckline? Which is most flattering on me? What about color? I love the yellow. I want yellow because I love Princess Belle."

AH! I can TOTALLY relate! But honey, that yellow sure ain't gonna work with your skin tone...

- Oh, and his second daughter is named Annabelle... they call her Belle.

Nice guy. We chit chat. He lives in Provo. He doesn't however, shop there in Provo for fear of running in to someone he knows. This is an "in the closet" hobby of his. Ok.

We finally decide on a sweetheart necked, navy blue ballgown, but shoot! We don't have an 18, and it's too small to let out the size 16 that we DO have.

Back into his normal man clothes. A green, "BYU Men's Chorus" polo. Hmmm.

We chit chat some more about needing to order and alter the dress he wants. (I pass that buck off to my manager...) And then the kicker:

"Are you a member of the predominant religion in the area?"

Yes. I am LDS, sir.

"Well, as you can see, most of these dresses are made to cover certain underclothing that women of that religion wear."

Where is he going with this???

"I would like to be able to find something that cover the male version of that underclothing."

Are y'all following me here? He then tells me that he would be uncomfortable buying and wearing a women's top for the dress. Uhhhh...

Doe eyes. Blinking. I'm an actress... this is TOTALLY normal...

"Yeah- that could be a problem." Blink. And twitch.

Nice guy. Odd experience. His wife's name is Amy.

Wife.

Thank you, Orlando, and the boys who love the P HOUSE, for allowing me to handle this situation with class.